On Independence

By annnieM (Deanna Mattox)

On the Fourth of July, five years ago, I got my first scooter. It is a four-wheel, rugged, metallic green scooter that I have named Oz, after the Emerald City. We somehow came across a man whose daughter has MS, who began selling scooters and mobility aids because of her. He actually drove here with an assortment of scooters for me to try out! I tried out a three-wheeled variety… and it was kind of tippy feeling… no good…and then I tried Oz!

Now any of you who have graduated to mobility aids know that it is difficult, to say the least, to use one in public in the beginning. I loved my green scooter for tooling around on our 10 acres! The independence was just amazing! I was still walking quite well then, except for distances, so going 200 yd. to the garden was an impossibility… not to mention what seemed like miles to the mailbox! It took a lot of courage, though, to go for a walk/scoot around the neighborhood with Dave. I won’t say I hung my head when people drove past… but I didn’t really want to be seen. I will tell you that when I drove through the grocery store the first half dozen times I actually turned around and avoided aisles because there were people I knew down them!! I just wasn’t ready to be seen this way.

Eventually I realized it was better to be seen this way than not seen at all.

With my scooter I was able to do stuff I had given up! Independence!! All of a sudden I was able to spend time with my husband whilst he was walking, gardening, even mowing the yard! (Speaking of mowing, in the beginning I thought riding the lawnmower around the property would be good enough… tee hee)

Eventually I found out that a four-wheeled scooter doesn’t turn well! The first day I had it my daughter, Zarah, rammed into a wall and put a hole in the sheet-rock. (that took years to fix) Anyway, after a year or two of not being able to turn around well, let alone fitting down clothes aisles at stores (like threading the proverbial needle!)… I decided it was time for a more maneuverable scooter. We called our friend Rod, and he just happened to have a reconditioned scooter that he could give us a good deal on. It turned out to be green too!! When I first sat on it there didn’t seem to be room enough for my knees. With some adjustment I managed to fit my long legs on this scooter. I never thought my legs were all that long…perhaps the scooter was made for a short person?

Anyway, I was now the owner of a three-wheeled scooter that could turn on a dime! After a few years on a four-wheel scooter… I was confident enough to not feel like I was going to end up on the pavement every time I turned! And turn I did! I reveled in my new ability to maneuver! I don’t know how many cookies I did that first week… but it was plenty! I could zip around on that thing in stores… let me tell you… I was kind of dangerous! I still pulled clothes off the racks, but it wasn’t because I couldn’t maneuver. It was because the darned stores put too much stuff to sell in their building. If they crowd everything together, how am I supposed to go through?? I purposefully raised a little heck… pulling blouses and such down behind me… wreaking havoc in many a store. It got to be where the employees would follow me around and rearrange as they picked up stuff. Sometimes, even, one would walk in front of me and make room. I tried to make my point nicely, really I did.

Independence!! Of course we still had to get a handicapped van with a ramp and kneeling… which we did on my brothers birthday, four years ago, I guess! It seems hard to believe we’ve had Woody(my van which just happens to have wood panels along the side) that long!! Now I could get into my van by just driving up the ramp and once inside I had a seat which swiveled and moved to make it easy to transfer! I was, literally speaking, in the driver’s seat!!

Woody took me anywhere I wanted to go! Problem is, once I got there, the place needed to be kind of handicapped accessible. It is amazing how many stores still have just one or two steps to enter them in our small town, USA. Those are the stores I do not buy from. I hope they feel the loss!

Woody couldn’t take me to Germany, though. I had to have a plane help me with that. (A plane I did not know well enough to name) But my new little three-wheeled scooter went to Germany! Germany has cobblestones! Germany is kind of rough around the edges, because of that. There were places I couldn’t go… but I managed quite well. There was a castle on a hill I did not get to, but only because the road leading up the hill was too steep! A lot of ambulatory people couldn’t make the climb, either! I did visit some places where I never thought I’d go! I was actually at Buchenwald! (concentration camp) My scooter would not take me everywhere there… I actually hobbled a few steps down to see the jail which now is a museum… a few steps more to see the crematorium…how very moving it all was… I thanked God I was able to walk yet!

Because of our trip to Germany, I named my second scooter the Pondhopper! It is green like a frog… a very pretty, sparkly green frog.

So you would think I was all set… an independent person again.

WRONG. All of a sudden my driving became questionable. Well, not all of a sudden… but over time. I even saw an occupational therapist who showed me how do drive with hand controls! That was two years ago. It really wasn’t that difficult! At that point in time he tested my reflexes and I was fine to drive still. Now I feel I’m not fine to drive once I’m tired. So pretty much for the last year people have been driving me around. (Driving Ms annnie?)

And then, Dave got fired… furloughed, they said. He had a medical savings plan at work…and we had money to use, or lose. Hand controls!! They came and Dave put them into Woody. Silly man, he put them in without the power assist option. (easier that way, he said, and more reliable) who gives a darn, if you can’t use them?? It takes about 10 lbs. Of strength to pull the gas on! I do not have that much strength after a day of shopping… silly man. Hand controls for Hercules? NOT. I need power assist. I wonder who he has been living with? Did he not know that I’m a gimp?? (I use that term with a smile… I hope I don’t offend anyone when referring to myself that way.) He will redo them, I can assure you. But I am able to drive again!

There is no real point in this whole ramble… except that perhaps I understand independence. I do not take it for granted! Sometimes when things are taken away from you, you realize how important they were! Like independence.

Independence…appreciate it.