a monthly online magazine,
by and for those with MS,
Tables of Contents
Why Did You Say That?
Late last August my husband, my son, his wife, my granddaughter and I were standing in our hotel room gazing at the beautiful Pacific Ocean at sunset time. They were about to leave to go to their room and my husband all of sudden says "how would you like it if we came by our RV to your place next summer?" Well I was in shock but everybody else was happy as anything and excited about it.
When they left for the evening I came unglued at my husband and said WHY DID YOU SAY THAT?? You and I have never discussed such a trip. I can’t travel 2,500 mile one way let alone 2,500 back home again and probably another 1000 in side trips. AND in the heat of summer…don’t you remember I don’t DO heat!! Plus our dog Katie doesn’t can’t do heat!
Then I went on about what heat does to me, how my ankles swell so bad that I can hardly walk when we drive too many hours, the stress of every day getting on the road again and to be gone a MONTH L My family lives in Ontario, Canada, which also means we had to get passports etc and a written letter from our Vet. Not to mention all the incidentals one would have to get ready for a trip like that which is A LOT! Where do I get the energy?
RVing is fun up to a point like if you are staying in a lovely resort RV Park that has all the amenities. But if you travel cross country you can run into places that are only good for the night, horrid laundry mats, too hot weather or other weather conditions that can be stressful. Finding good places to eat out at or stores to buy food from that we know and trust.
What about the cost of gas now…..do the math on that one for 6,000 miles whoa! What if the RV or Truck gets a problem, what if one of us gets sick or worse THAT is a LONG way from home! Now I know people do this all the time but our health is not the best, we are older and this goes for Katie as well.
I have new health problems and so does Katie and the thought never occurred to me to travel from the West coast, to the East coast and then into Canada. I don’t want to do this at all and think it is a very bay idea. My husband is of the opposite opinion SO now we have a problem!
I would of course LOVE to see my family on their ‘turf’ and hold my new great granddaughter for the first time and meet other family members on my daughter in laws side and see Canada. The problem is the getting there (I don’t fly anymore) not the being there.
So for many many months I wrestled with this plan and finally decided I would go based on some of the compromises and promises my husband made. Things like leaving in mid September, not driving so long each day, not cooking much, taking more breathers in a day or maybe not being on the road every day. Planning out our clothes in such a way to minimize those dreaded laundry mats and stopping around 4:00pm each day and getting a good rest before the next day.
Then out of the blue our extremely loved dog comes down with a potentially serious health problem one that has no cure. It may be or not controlled by the meds they put her on, only time will tell. She has ALWAYS gone with us everywhere and we would never leave her anywhere! If she is lucky enough to have MANY MANY more months that would be wonderful but a trip like this would be WAY too hard on her now. We believe in giving a pet every possible chance to live!
There is no way now I want to take that trip now but I think my husband still does. We had this talk a while back if we were ever told we had just 6 months to live what would we want to do. Our responses were totally opposite but it does play into why my husband wants to take this trip and I understand that.
It is just what if Katie has 6 months or less left then how does he feel, so now this is a big concern! If she died on the trip I could NOT continue it and if she dies before it I would be too upset to go. So we have a dilemma and how this trip idea works out remains to be seen.
Ideally to me I would cancel the whole thing and wait for a much better time or never. When my husband said we may not be up it next year I said it was already beyond me. Stress and heat are HUGE enemies to my MS and totally do me in and just cause general havoc and I wouldn’t want to be away from home when that happens! I am just hoping that there is a better way for all us too see each other, like something we may have not thought of yet.
Reach Holly through the magazine to comment: email@example.com