Playing this page:
Born to Be Wild
by John Caldwell
I had been visiting a friend in the
hospital after her hysterectomy. Catching up on her progress we got to chatting
with the woman she shared the room with and her significant other. They
introduced themselves as Spike and Jane in for her operation. She has gotten an
ostomy and was just getting use to it. We chatted away the day finding out that
they ride motorcycles and their number one complaint, tail gators. They each had
their own bikes and their own way of dealing with it.
Spike speaks up, "We keep rocks in our saddle bags.”
“They don't always work!” says Jane, “I
toss them up in the air so it will come down on their hood.”
A nurse comes in with the new ostomy bags so us guys vacate. Going out
the door I ask Spike, “Aren't ya'll concerned about breaking a windshield and
causing a wreck?”
think we've got that covered. We have mostly pea gravel, of course there are a
few bigger ones just in case. Ya know what I mean?” Spike said as he lit up.
Spike and I chat while he smoked.
finished I said, “They should be through in there let's go on in.”
Lighting up another Spike tells me, “I'm going to have another you go on and
I'll be in after...”
The door is open so I go in to finish talking to my friend Joy. “So how
are you doing?” I asked Joy.
they gave me some pills I bet at some high price!”
they say when you can go home yet?”
Joy and I work for the City of Dallas where she does the books and department
time sheets. I do building maintenance on the night shift so I am dropping by on
the way in.
going on, take care and get better”! I said as I started to leave.
Jane is sitting up looking a bit bored. “Ya leavin so soon”?
got to go toil !”
“Well it looks like I get to go home, too, they taught me what to do with
this bag,” Jane said as she fiddled with her new appliance. “At least they
missed my tattoos!”
“Oh yeah, my sister Jan came up with what you can do to the tailgaters,”
I said as I headed out the door.
“And that is?” she asks.
“Oh she has one of those, too, she said just toss it at them. If they
wreck how are they going to explain what hit their windshield?”
Jane and Joy were laughing as I walked out the door. Jane was laughing so hard
she had to hug her pillow to her belly.
I pass Spike at the door and remark, “Your turn,”
Reach John by email to comment:
top of page