MS MuSings
a Monthly Online Magazine
By and For Those with MS,
Multiple Sclerosis
May 2008, Issue 104
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MS MuSings a Monthly Online Magazine By and For Those with MS, Multiple Sclerosis May 2008, Issue 104 |
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Tables of Contents Other Monthly Please Visit
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Playing this page: Theme from Forrest Gump (Please Blog with Luis here) by sefardisafran | Permanent Link | Cosmos REMEMBER WHEN………. By Luis M. Méndes Something we try to do when we have a Nice day! Something we try to remember when we have a Nice day! Words we remember from long ago bringing Nice memories! Something we try to hold on to when we have a Nice day! Something we hear when we have a Nice day! Something we want to see when we have a Nice day! Something we want to say when we have a Nice day!
Do, remember, nice memories, hold on to, hear, see
And……….. When was the last time we did something without pain and without stretching our aching muscles and nerves to the limit? And………. When was the last time we remembered something clearly and without writing notes? And………. When was the last time we had a “nice” time? And……… When was the time we had the strength to hold on to something? And……… When was the time we heard clearly? When was the last time we could see without straining our eyes? When was the last time we had a real nice day?
So, should we forget about “remembering”? sometimes I can’t stop my memories of happy times, love-filled moments laughing and dancing, see? These are the memories that keep me alive and I hope you too see? That’s the only thing that remains see? Close our tired eyes and dreaming of past sceneries see? Hear the words of one that loves and cares for us see? That is OUR world, a world of “remember when…” Sometimes our “remember when’s” are as far back as yesterday! Other times are clear pictures of long gone days This is the fuel that keep us alive the fuel that Creates the fire burning our minds, hearts and bodies What really hurts most of us And sometimes we don’t recognize Is how AWARE we are of our loses How aware we are of the restrictions imposed by the MonSter!
Sometimes our lives are based on those good moments I accept them as a gift from the Creator, gift? You ask Sure, I truly believe is a gift Just imagine if you couldn’t remember happier times How much hurt and pain we’d feel in our souls
My very last declaration is that I am very happy to be able to remember that most of the time I am flying high among clouds among my memories sadly, those too will disappear!
Let’s have lots of dreams let’s put all our dreams together lets fill our selves with the fine mist of happy memories.
Our world is not limited as long as we are to remember! our beloved ones that are gone are alive as long as they Live in our memories. ________________________________________ Luis M. Méndes “Remember When” © 5/2007 ==================================
Remembering
Sometimes is good, when you remember to ask the money your friend owes you, the date with the lovely girl in a romantic bistro when you just allow time flaw and not worrying about it! when your friends come to visit and cry of happiness when your son calls “just to know how you are doing” when the doctor listens to the litany of aches and pains when you ask the doctor to reduce the amount of medication meaning chemicals you swallow on a daily basis and he says “what about eliminating the Vit.C?” …..and leaving the rest as it is when the neurologist (witch doctor in charge of CNS) asks you the same old “A, B, C, etc, etc”? almost given to cost…you only have to co-pay $500? or something like $1590.00 per month multiply times 12 and please don’t have diarrhea for a week!
Sometimes is better not to remember forget not remember make believe an attack of short-term-memory
Yes, sometimes is better to have a “weak” memory when was the last time your good friend called? the same one that used to call you “brother” the time the store manager gave you the “Oh No! you here again!”
Yes sometimes is a sour “note” to know we have to live like this which, by the way, it isn’t easy but remember, you can live with it! When the same pencil drops from your fingers “is the World against me?” No, not the whole world but the MonSter “NEVER GIVE UP” says the one you never asked “give up what?” my catheters? my wetness protection “give up” how difficult it is to see? “give up” your total impotence? “give up to” engage in the daily battle?
But, of course I don’t give up you nitwit But of course not you arrogant idiot! But of course………… Have I run out of words or ideas? you bet! Of course we all run out of words! you are the first one to ask me to “repeat” when my slurred speech hurts your ears!
Of course I am going to give up but do you know hat am I going to give up? Talking to you stupid ass! you always remarking the things I no longer have and the good way (your way) to correct them! I (WE) don’t need people giving us pointers, We don’t need people to show us how to live! We don’t need you, arrogant peacock that suffers from a mild form of MS show us with the Progressive kind, with the ones we have wetted our pants and cushions!
What are you, second rate tv personality shown me how to survive when my spoon spills all the soup on my bib! when the spasms almost throw us off our chairs! You should be quiet and LEARN from US And learn some valuable lessons in our day to day lives!
We don’t need any more conferences, Empty promises, empty hopes gut wrenching lies Stupid “walks”, sacrifices for our survival. Show me the accessible home. Show me the accessible Library and School Show me the accessible doctors’ offices! Show me ……….No! better shut up and show me NOTHING! I AM TIRED AND PISSED OFF! They way I like it!
Remembering © Luis M. Méndes Hoboken NJ VI MMVII =================================== Travel(s)
Wish I could travel and yet..... it takes such a careful planning remembering catheters, afo's passing the "inspection" that always leaves a sour taste when an stranger looks in your personal items, remember the time I had to explain a "hard-faced" "female inspector" what a condom catheter was, what the term of intermittent catheterization with size French 12 catheters are good for!
Leave your beloved chair in charge of individuals famous for inefficiency and total disregard for others' personal items! and all in the name of "security" is a catheter considered a dangerous item? is a condom catheter with tube and drain bag good to risk the life of other travelers?
Oh! and the arrival! the endless lines the same stern look the long haul to put my chair back together, taxis, are they reluctant to carry "strange" passengers?
The hotel that some idiot said was 101% accessible after climbing 4 steps and going through a revolving door! Your exhaustion is total, the deceptions multiple, "I want to lie in bed for at least 24 hours!"
You feel sorry for your beloved wife, she wanted to just to participate in the different tours so what are you going to do? End every moment DREAMING about the comforts of your home? Feel sick to the core for your wife's wanting to participate in the "outside world"
When every second is just a lost opportunity to join other fellow travelers dressed in ridiculous bright red-orange-yellow shirts and bermuda shorts when every second you find yourself restless after a bad night sleep, a narrow door, a bathroom accessible to a midget
And you add not only the time you lose and force your beloved one to miss! What made me do this? Why didn't I stay and let my wife go and enjoy travels designed for "able bodies"?
Never again, the few times you are able to go outside the same question repeats "and the local crips, where are they?" in the "closet"?....... You bet!
So for me another kind of travel is far more comfortable, far less expensive and the risks of total frustration sort of evaporate in the haze of the Summer......talking about Summer, why did you have to take a trip at this time?
Thank you, but NO thank you, I enjoy the peacefulness of my home-based-life, too hot-humid stay in a/c! cold? stay at home Wear my "sleep ware" all day, answer the phone whenever feel like and just do YOUR own life
I have traded travel for a good mystery book, my computer, my radios, my cameras the easy simple life of a real MSER! _________________________________ Luis M. Méndes © Hoboken NJ VII MMVII
Reach Luis by email to comment: LMN2GKI@aol.com |
